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As people of Faith, we have the duty of
commanding good and forbidding evil. We
thus engage ourselves, as social beings,
in improving ourselves and working towards
being instruments in improving the world
we live in. Our Faith behooves us not to
search for faults in others and we would
do well to heed the advice of our Beloved
Prophet : "Part of being a good person
is minding your own business."
While the purpose of commanding good and
forbidding evil is to correct and restore;
fault-finding inevitably leads to undermining
the character of people and sometimes to
destroying relationships. Prophet Muhammad
said: "The worst of people are those
engaged in slandering others, those who
ruin relationships between dear ones who
try to find fault with innocent people."
The Prophet also admonished us that "when
you pursue the faults of others, you corrupt
them" and warned that "those who
unduly pursue the shortcomings of others
will have their own faults exposed."
Fault-finding is the habit of the miserable
Confucius said: "the great person
calls to attention the good points in others
while the miserable person calls to attention
the defects in others." (Analects 12:16).
That is perhaps why losers can easily say,
"something is wrong" and winners
usually say, "how can I correct it".
Why losers say, "why don't you do this?"
and winners usually say, "here is something
I can do."
Fault-finders normally tell others about
someone's faults and rarely have the guts
to face people; fitting the description
of dhul-wajhayn (two-faced) which the Prophet
Muhammad assigned to troublemakers and hypocrites.
Fault-finders also tend to be miserable
themselves, lacking self-esteem; and since
they focus so much on blaming others, they
become resentful; and rather than cherish
people, tend to develop a desire to undermine
and discredit people.
Negativity consumes a person
The negative feelings that a fault-finder
harbors regarding others eventually consumes
the person and this negativity eventually
becomes part of the fault-finder's character.
Prophet Muhammad therefore advised us "Refrain
from holding bad opinions of people."
Deflecting one's own shortcomings
One of the common ways through which people
deflect their own shortcomings and do not
face up to their own faults is to blame
others. The faults we see may well not be
in what we are looking at, but rather in
our looking. Prophet 'Isa/Jesus is reported
to have said; "why do you look at the
little speck in your brother's eye and forget
the plank in your own eye". Hadrat
'Ali said: "The worst of people is
the person who searches for faults in others
while being blind to his own faults".
Martin Luther King rightly said: "the
highest form of maturity is self inquiry".
Watch your Heart, your Emotions and
your Tongue
Speech is projection of thoughts and emotions;
the content of speech reflects the culture
of the heart, so consider carefully how
you feel about others, why you feel the
way you feel and what you say about people.
Prophet Muhammad said: "None of your
faith is correct unless your heart is upright
and your heart will not be rectified until
your tongue is in order". That is why
Allah states in the Quran "speak what
is correct, your actions will be rectified
and your sins will be forgiven". Since
virtually all fault-finding is conveyed
verbally, we must be careful of the power
of the tongue since wise people caution
the fact that affliction caused by the tongue
is more severe than the harm caused by the
sword. The Prophet also provided a basic
rule of good character when he responded
to a question regarding salvation. He replied:
"It is necessary for you to control
your tongue and weep for your own faults".
The prayer of the Prophet is the most appropriate
expression for one who introspects and genuinely
wishes to be a catalyst for a better world:
"O Allah, forgive that which I did
secretly and what I did publicly; What I
did inadvertently and what I did deliberately;
What I did knowingly and what I did out
of ignorance".
Always reflect on this advice of the Prophet
: "glad tidings to the person more
concerned about his own faults than bothering
about the faults of others".
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